Canberra, Australia – In a move that has left Australians scratching their heads, Prime Minister is steering the nation into uncharted democratic waters with a proposal that introduces a mind-bending paradox. Brace yourselves, because Australia is seriously contemplating a national referendum on the very concept of holding referendums, and it turns out, breaking free from…
Canberra, Australia – The Australian imperial government has today announced that they will revise the citizenship pledge and national flag to better reflect the countries somewhat less liberal and less democratic values. The updated flag and citizenship pledge is proposed as follows: New Citizenship Pledge From this time forward, under the Supreme Leader,I pledge my…
Melbourne, Australia. September 19th, 2021 – After successfully bowling over an elderly woman who was participating in a protest and then pepper spraying her, police have confirmed this will be incorporated into their standard operating procedures for handling protests. “The Victorian state police are proud to announce that we will be embracing an equal-opportunity approach…
Canberra, Australia. September 16th, 2021 – New Zealand was disappointed today to find out they’ve been left out of the newly forged Australia, UK, US, or “AUKUS” security pact. Sources involved in the new pact pointed out that the problem was rooted in New Zealand lacking an actual real military, making it rather difficult to…
Sydney, Australia – The Taliban has called on the Australian government to respect the democratic rights of Australians, nearly all of whom are perpetually confined to their homes under COVID home-detention edicts. Zabiullah Mujahid, the spokesman of the Afghan government, said “the Australian government has removed virtually all rights of Australians, we hereby call on…
Christmas Island, Australia. September 3rd, 2021 – The Australian Government today announced that Australians who refused to be vaccinated will be relocated to labour camps “for their own safety”. The labour camps will be set up on Christmas Island, an Australian territory approximately 1500km (1000 miles) northwest of the mainland, at the site of the…
Sydney, Australia – The Australian government, faced with the threat of unapproved speech, radical notions of freedom of expression and calls for democracy, will deploy the Army on to the streets of Sydney. The federal government has said they are “saddened that the military’s annual inclusivity rainbow finger-painting exercises had to be brought to a…
SYDNEY, Australia – The Australian Federal government has announced an ambitious plan to stop climate change in it’s tracks. The Prime Minister said in today’s announcement “apparently dead plants and trees in state forests can be burned by fire, I mean this is some really cutting edge science. Logically pre-emptively torching our state forests means…
Australian state and territory governments have lobbied the federal government to fund building a border wall around the state of Victoria
