Major airlines have announced today that the vaccination rate of their workforce has increased from 60% to 100% overnight, after all those refusing the vaccine were “let go”.
An airline executive explained the miracle increase in vaccination rates, “we used to have 100,000 employees of which only 60,000 where vaccinated. However as we’ve now fired everyone who wasn’t vaccinated, our remaining workforce of 60,000 are 100% vaccinated. We try to think of our workers as numbers so as to avoid humanising them, that’s why we call them ‘human resources’. We take the approach that staff are best thought of as a consumable item, like jet fuel, or an aircraft that has reached it’s replacement date.”
The government is taking a similar approach and will shortly reach 100% vaccination rate after all anti-vaxxer government employees were similarly “relieved” of their jobs. This is seen as a clear win for the current administrations vaccine mandates, which demonstrates the policy’s effectiveness in achieving 100% vaccination compliance.
Civil society leaders have said that this breakthrough in eliminating the unvaccinated has potential to be applied in other areas of daily life and government. “We can achieve a 100% literacy rate, 100% employment rate, 0% poverty rate and 100% equality, all by removing undesirables from society. We are considering options, but some means of terminating these non-confirming members of society is the general idea, perhaps through a nefarious vaccination program? Although that won’t work as a way or eliminating anti-vaxxers obviously. We’re open to ideas, however an elimination strategy against members of the population who make the government look bad is definitely the way forward for our Western liberal democracy.”
